How often do we settle for other people’s comfort at the cost of our well-being? It is more common than most people will openly admit. We feel that a person meeting social/family obligation is the model of a good person. Even if those obligations are floating in thin air without any cause to them. Even when it leaves you torn, move you away from your inner compass. How often do you question what is asked of you, with rationality and awareness?
Someone recently told me – there is a thin line between kindness and foolishness. I know I have suffered more for the sake of being kind than other things because I have been foolish to feel so passionately for those asking for help, I put self on the back seat. Several times in my life, I have donated 80-90% of my resources when I needed them most, lended my grace times and last of energy in pursuing other people’s chores when I needed to invest in myself (It has been THAT bad!). It took me 31 years to now really see, I had been so drunk into this cultural crap, I was always evaluating my worth from people around me. I had developed this urgency that others need it more than me. To give is a great thing, but to give pieces of you is foolishness. Because then, others start expecting you to serve them pieces of you. Nothing less would do.
Don’t do that! What good is a farmer who refuses to plough his own land?
If someone demands what you can’t/shouldn’t provide, wish them well and go your way. It might make you look like an A**hole but, know that people making uncomfortable demands/requests of you are no better either.
Be kind to yourself first. There is NO shame in putting your well-being foremost and distancing from inconsiderate individuals. Cut out the Drama. You will be assuring that you live truly in whatever years that are left in you.